Feb 5: Alien Blogger

You meet an alien and need to explain to it blogging. Explain what blogging is (and what blogging means to you) without ever using the word “blog.”

Well, obviously this alien being isn’t a threat, and is actually nice and civil and doesn’t want to destroy humanity or steal me away for a fun filled night probing… which, let’s face it, shouldn’t really be much of a threat to any gay man, considering that generally we would call the same thing with another guy ‘Friday night’.

So I will also assume that this alien can both speak and understand english so that I don’t have to deal with over-the-top hand gestures, or resort to playing some kind of weird version of charades…

is it a book, or a fil’um

So this is a phenomenon that was created kind of a way to express one’s thoughts and opinions online to a much wider audience, rather than just a persons immediate social circle. Many people have different types of these sites. Some use it as a person diary; some use it to write reviews of movies, restaurants, clothing etc; some use it to display their cooking skills, or some simply want to share cat videos with the world.

Not every site is the same as the next, as everybody is different, and each person has something different that they want to share with the rest of the world, or at least, whoever is actually taking the time to read what they’ve posted.

For me, I use it as a platform to get into a habit of writing regularly, as I have aspirations of writing something much bigger, and more in depth, but I find that even just the basic task of writing daily to be quite a challenge a lot of the time, so I don’t know how I’m going to manage to write something with more substance to it. I actually have two of these sites that I use, one is for my daily writing challenges, and the other is for documenting all the stupid interactions that I have with people. It’s like a  play-by-play of the stupid things that people say and do either to me, or around me, that make me want to bang my head against a wall in utter frustration.

Feb 4: Others Perspective

Do you think it’s possible to ever truly see the world from another person’s perspective, or are we held so tightly to our own way of viewing the world?

I don’t think that everybody can see an argument from both sides of the fence. I feel as though that’s an ability only held by certain people. I feel like I’m one of those people. Yes, I have the ability to see another persons perspective, but it might take a bit of explaining for me to do so.

I will openly admit that when I have an opinion of something, then I find that I get cemented in that opinion, and refuse to listen to any others that might contradict, or go against whatever ideal I might be in support of. However, once I come back down to earth and stop acting like a dickhead, I will welcome somebody to explain their viewpoint. I might not necessarily agree with what they’re saying; I will probably more than likely cement myself in my opinion even further and try to explain that to them instead – especially if their argument is something that seems to be quite closed or narrow-minded.

Usually, this leads to further discussions, or in my case, arguments, but although I’m more than aware that everybody is entitled to their opinion, I keep expecting them to have my opinion. So naturally, when they don’t, I can find myself in a heated debate / argument with them about it.That’s usually when I get to a point where I simply cannot talk any sense into them and walk away from the conversation.

Feb 3: Today’s Event Perspective

Write about an event that happened today. Now write about it from the perspective of someone else in the room — your child, your partner, a person dining in the same restaurant… your choice.

I’m currently sitting on an Air New Zealand flight back to Melbourne from Auckland. We were up this morning at 4am, with a taxi booked for 5am so that we could be checked-in at the airport by 5:45am for an 8am flight.

Given that we had 2 hours to kill, I suggested that we go and spend that time in the Air NZ Koru lounge. That way we could sit somewhere that’s actually comfortable, we could have a decent breakfast, watch a tv episode or start a movie etc on my iPad, or even have a bit of a nap until we board the plane.

Hulk didn’t want to.

After learning that the cost to do so was going to be NZD$55, he immediately dismissed this suggestion, as he refused to pay money to go and be comfortable. It can be hard to negotiate with somebody who can be quite bull-headed and stubborn, especially when they’ve already made up their mind about something and refuse to budge or listen to reason. I suppose from his point of view, he didn’t want to spend any more money, and no doubt viewed spending another fifty bucks as an unnecessary expense. However, in hindsight, I should have just organised and paid for it all myself and not said anything to him, and then he’d probably be more accepting of it, because it didn’t cost him anything.

I wonder if you can buy lounge access online… Perhaps next time I should just do that and not say anything??

Jan 31: NaBloPoMo Pressure Jan Edition

Did you feel a lot of pressure with January’s NaBloPoMo?

I really struggled with Jan’s NaBloPoMo, mainly because I didn’t structure myself properly to include a set time to actually write my posts. More often than not, I would get either too busy or too lazy for a couple of days, and then have to spend and entire afternoon / evening writing a bunch of posts just so I could catch up, and get them all out of the way.

Like right now. I’ve got another 9 posts in order for me to catch up completely, and I’m not sure how many I’ll be able to get through before I need to go to bed, or go to work.

I’m actually that far behind, January’s NaBloPoMo has finished and February has already begun, so the pressure is going to continue. Now I have to try and work out when I’m going to be able to sit down for a decent chunk of time and really smash out a string of posts, whilst still making them seem readable and not seem so… rushed.

Jan 30: Persuading Others

If you could persuade people to do one thing right now, what would it be?

I would actually try to persuade people to have more of a social conscience.

Only in the past few years have I really developed more of a social conscience in terms of being more vocal about things that I believe in – things like animal rights, climate change, marriage equality, boycotting companies that don’t support the same beliefs that I have.

And then we end up with this complete and utter monstrosity, Tony Abbott, as our leader, who is so completely backwards, he almost seems to be determined to try and inflict as much damage as possible, so that when he gets voted out at the next election, him and his Liberal government will then have all this damage and destruction to use as a platform for the incoming government, and use that to make them look inadequate because they won’t be able to fix it overnight, and they wont have billions of dollars at their disposal to start trying to undo all the damage that the Abbott government has, is and will cause to our country.

Without actually thinking about the country that we live in and the world that we live in, people tend to just sit back and ignore or avoid these kind of things because they don’t think it affects them; or they think that they can make a change, (or maybe they don’t want to?!) but the fact still remains, that there is a lot of shit that happens in this world, and not enough people really seem to care about it to do anything to create a positive change. Yes, there are a number of activists out there, but more often than not, they give the actual term ‘activist’ a bad reputation.

What’s the first thing you see in your head when you hear the word activist? I’m just gonna go out on a limb here and suggest that it’s something like a person with some signs / placards, chaining themselves to a fence or a tree, or maybe standing in the way of a bulldozer in a picket line. Perhaps they’re rocking out a giant mop of bushy dreadlocks, screaming into a megaphone, barefoot, with a face full of piercings and referring to themselves in the third person by their alternate non-religious name of Sapphire or Moonflower.

That doesn’t have to be the case. Any body can be an activist without having to resort to that kind of action. You can do little things, small every-day things, that will at least make you feel like you’re doing your part to help a worthy cause.

Personally, I’m not going to go out of my way to go to a rally. Even if it’s for something that I support, I generally loathe them, because you see those people I just described, and they make me want to throat-punch them. Instead, I do my own stuff. I’ll sign petitions; I’ll buy only free-range eggs; I’ve even gone to the point now where I completely emptied my entire bathroom skincare and hair care products for cruelty-free brands. I’ll donate money to charities like the RSPCA, or supporting initiatives for the homeless. I refuse to support companies that don’t support marriage equality, or have financial ties to anti-gay organisations like the christian lobby. I no longer donate clothing to The Salvation Army or The Red Cross because they refuse to help people who are in need that are homosexual. Those people are more than happy to take my hard-earned pink dollars, but if I ever found myself in need of their assistance, it’s so disheartening to know that the people who gladly took my money would refuse to help me.

Why would I continue to support that. Especially when I’d blindly been doing so for so many years. Part of me wishes I could ask for a refund of everything I’ve donated to them, just so I could give it to a more deserving charity.

But I am just one person. I cannot make a big enough difference to influence any change, but I can tell other people about it. And they can tell people, and so on and so forth. But there’s a difference between agreeing that there is a lot of stuff that is wrong in this world and actually stepping up and doing something to make a difference.

So if you were to sit there and make a list of what do you feel strongly about in terms of a broader social aspect, what would you write down? What are your top five issues? What small steps can you take to make a small difference?? And for those of you that believe in it, I think we can agree that by making a positive change for a social cause will bring you good karma.

And everybody wants good karma, right?

Jan 29: Influencing Others

Are you good at influencing other people?

I think that I can certainly have my moments when I’m talking to others and trying to persuade them or convince them of something. But I find that it’s much easier for me to try and persuade them than it is for them to try and persuade me. I’m simply too stubborn and would prefer to have my own opinion first, and then have others provide their opinions as well as a means of support.

I think it just depends on what exactly it is I’m trying to influence others of. I find that if it’s something that they might not necessarily know much (if anything about) then I can sometimes explain the situation to them so that they are aware… but I can just as easily skew that information to lead them to make the decision themselves, even though it’s the decision that I’d already made, I just lead them in that particular direction and let them think that they got there all on their own.

Other situations, however, aren’t that simple or straightforward. Sometimes it can actually be quite difficult to try and influence others. In some circumstances it can sometimes be almost impossible to even get others to see your point of view because they’re so focused on their point of view, they won’t even consider anything else. Nothing else exists. To an extent it reminds of the old adage ‘if you’re not with me, then you’re against me’. To normal people, this seems completely ridiculous because we see the world in shades of grey (just not 50 of them!), whereas they are only seeing things in black or white; yes or no.

Those people, I find, there’s simply no talking to; no reasoning with them.

Jan 28: Responsibilities

Which of your responsibilities stress you out the most?

After sitting here thinking about this for the past few minutes, I’m still struggling to come up with something. I don’t really have responsibilities. I’m not a parent, I don’t have kids, I don’t have to do school pick-ups, or baby sit, or shuttle kids around to weekend sports, I don’t have a pet, I don’t have a mortgage, I’m not paying off a car…

….I think that based purely on that, some people would just consider my life to be sad and empty.

I think that the most stressful thing I have to be concerned about are really basic mundane things like what I’m going to wear to work, is the public transport going to run on time for a change so I can actually get to work before 9am, and what am I going to listen to whilst on transport.

Gee… so much pressure!!

Jan 23: Temper Under Control

Do you think it’s possible to control your temper when facing enormous pressure?

This is something that I regularly struggle with. I find that I do go through periods where I am under a lot of pressure, whether it’s work related or pressure I put on myself for whatever reason, and I find that when I am feeling stressed out like that, then I more than often just want to be left alone.

It usually gets to a point where I will snap at anybody for even talking to me, because I’m so heavily focused on what I’m doing at that time. The worst part is when I do actually reach that point, and somebody does cross the line (you know, that line that I only I know exists, and they don’t, essentially meaning their stepping into a lions den without realising it… yeah, that line) I shoot my mouth off… and I shoot to kill.

I cannot deny that I have quite a potty mouth on me, some people find it quite entertaining, some don’t, but when I shoot my mouth off when I am angry… it’s like going down swinging. I will use my words to completely tear somebody apart, and most of the time, I just say it to be a nasty malicious bitch. When I find myself at that point where I can’t even think clearly because I’m so full of rage, my mind shuts off, and my mouth takes over. This is usually why most of the time, when I’m involved in some kind of argument or disagreement, I can’t really remember anything that I say.

I know I say things that are nasty. I know that I say things that are hurtful. I usually just do so as a warning to others… it’s sort of like my way of saying ‘don’t think about even LOOKING at me’, but the thing with that is that when I shoot my mouth off in one of those moments, I really don’t necessarily mean anything that actually comes out of my mouth (because, like I said, I usually just say shit in the heat of the moment), but although I don’t think anything of it, others end up getting quite upset or offended.

That tends to make these situations worse, because I think that they’re being too sensitive, and that makes me look like even more of a bitch.

*sigh*

Evidently, I have a problem.

Jan 24: Pressure To Rebel

Does pressure ever make you want to rebel and do the exact opposite of what is being asked of you?

Oh lordy, does it ever!!

I have this ‘trait’ – it’s almost instinctive, like I can’t even control it. It usually rears its ugly head whenever I’m in a bad mood, or feeling incredibly frustrated, or highly stressed. And it can be the most trivial request. Somebody can ask me to do something for them, and I’ll purposely go out of my way to not do it. I’m not saying that this happens on a regular basis, but I will admit that I have my moments.

It’s childish, and stubborn and completely stupid, but it’s something that happens. I’m not really sure why it happens, but it does.

However, sometimes I don’t even get to that part – more often than not, too much pressure just makes me want to throw my hands up and completely give up on whatever task I’m doing. It might just seem too difficult, or there might not seem like there’s any end in sight, and I find myself just wanting to throw in the towel and give up.

Again, childish and stupid.

Jan 22: Bad Temper

Do you have a bad temper? How often do you lose your temper?

You know how some people will say something like ‘I have a short fuse…’ Well, I have no fuse. I can completely change my mental stage from happy-go-lucky-rainbows-and-puppies to something like white-hot-table-flipping-murderous-rage in a heartbeat.

Trust me, I know that it’s not normal, nor is it healthy, but that’s how I function. I’m not entirely sure why I am the way I am, but I just am, so I have to accept it.

And before you even start making suggestions, I’m going to stop you right there. I’ve tried meditation and relaxation techniques, and they don’t work. I should perhaps investigate more into something like proper anger-management therapy, but that really just requires effort, and I’ve already got enough on my plate as it is. I don’t have time for therapy.

I will say, however, that since I’ve started blogging regularly, I’ve noticed a small change in my demeanor… small, and only slightly noticeable, but it’s a start. Don’t get me wrong, I still at times find myself full of rage, but it’s not as regular or as severe as it has been in the past. I think being able to just write and get stuff off my mind certainly helps a lot… Now I just have to find some time to really start working on the other writing projects I have in the back of my mind – that might even be the therapy that I need.

Who knows?!

And, of course, just to make things worse, I’m a Scorpio.

Well, I’m on the cusp of both Scorpio and Sagittarius, so I have tendencies of both, but predominantly, I’m a Scorpio – and if you’ve ever gotten on the wrong side of a Scorp. then you will know what I mean when I say we are quite capable of making life hell.

I’m not entirely sure why I have such a temper… I’m not really sure where it came from, or when it really started to get so bad, but for as long as I can remember, I have always had a bad mood. Maybe it’s just something that’s ingrained in me simply because I am a Scorpio. I’m not really sure.

But the other part of my bad temper, is that I hold grudges. I really wish that I didn’t, and sometimes I really try hard to let things go and just move on so that I’m not still holding on to the past, but dammit, it’s actually really hard to do. And even then, I have my moments. I can hold a grudge for years, and then if you ask me about it on a day where I’m feeling great and living in the present, then I act as though I’ve let go of the drama and it doesn’t exist anymore… until I fall into a bad mood again, and then it’s as though it’s always been there.

Even in some circumstances where I say that I’ve let go of the drama, I will never forget.

If something has happened that has really affected me, emotionally, physically, etc, that’s going to stay with me for a very, very long time. Some people have some ability to simply shrug their shoulders and let it go as though it never happened, because it’s always going to be in the past, and you can’t change the past.

…why can’t I do that?? Probably because I’m too busy being in a bad mood, visualising somebody else’s downfall in some horrific way, and holding a permanent grudge.