The Post-Dinner Journey Home (Or  ‘How I Found Myself Waiting For a Bus In North Melbourne at 11:30pm on a Tuesday!’)

Tonight I had dinner with a girlfriend of mine in the city post-gym (yes, I’m already noticing that I’m using ‘post-‘ too much, but I can’t control myself).

It was one of those dinners that had always been talked about (“So, next week, lets catch up for dinner!”)… But inevitably doesn’t happen for a multitude of reasons – too busy, too sick, too tired, too broke, other commitments etc. there’s always an excuse. But unlike some people, I also acknolwedge that these things happen (read: life!) and we’re not capable of doing absolutely everything we’d like to, because, well, we don’t have 35hrs in the day. 

So after weeks and weeks and weeks of postponing our dinner date, we finally locked it in. A chance to finally sit down and have a real catch up and actually have some real conversation for a change, something that I have particularly been craving. 

And it was so much more than I thought it would be. We ended up talking about blogging – the ins and outs of it, like a very generalised ‘how-to’ and I ended up inspiring a fellow creative person to start writing a blog – and if she’s reading this, I hope she knows how much I’m looking forward to reading her future content, just as I’m very nervous about having her read my content, which was something that we spoke about also. 

However, this interaction made me realise something: just how foreign it felt to have somebody that you know, express their interest and excitement in reading something that I’ve written, let alone inspire them to do the same. But further to that, I realised how foreign it felt just to have somebody you know support you in doing something that is quite personal and creates so much vulnerability. 

It was support and encouragement that I’ve not had for quite some time. Support and encouragement that I’ve only ever gotten from one other person, and unfortunately not the person I was in a relationship with. I’m not saying that I’m a needy person, or that I need somebody to constantly blow smoke up my arse and tell me how ‘amazing’ I am. Instead it’s more about getting acknowledgement and recognition for something that is quite personal, and an aspect of me that not everybody knows exists. Usually when I tell somebody about my blog, they’re quite surprised because I rarely mention it; I don’t shout it from the rooftops. Then when they read some of my content, there’s more surprise – generally because it’s so unexpected and yet completely complements my personality. So it’s always nice when somebody genuinely shows an interest / support / encouragement in something that I’m doing. You know, like being an actual human. 

So after much conversation and excitement and food, it was getting late and we said our goodbyes and I began my journey home. Usually a late night in the city would make me choose the convenience of getting a taxi home, but in comparing the cost to the convenience, I opted for public transport. 

Riding the escalator to the train station I merely glimpsed at the board and saw one of my train lines and 2min on the board. Did I actually read the board properly? No.  So there’s me, full from dinner and running through the station like a crazy person, trying to get down the escalator to the platform without falling over and breaking my neck, I arrive on Platform 3 only to discover the train arriving, isn’t actually the train I thought I would be catching. My next immediate assumption is that perhaps the board said to catch this train, and then change at a further station. 

I jumped on the train and took a seat, trying not to be too distracted by the woman staring at me whilst she was on the phone, and jumped off at the station you generally change trains on and I look at the boards there. My next train: 26mins. 

😳😩😫😖😤☹️😠😡🤔🤔🤔

I open my phone and work out when the next bus home is insted. So I start walking. Walking around the back streets of North Melbourne late at night is certainly a new experience for me, but not one I’m in any hurry to repeat. 

I walk and I walk, and eventually come across the bus stop. The eerie thing is that there’s nobody around. No people. No cars. And for a moment I feel like I’ve stepped into some kind of scary movie. But then the lights changed and headlights peeked over the hill and that sign of civilisation brought me back to reality. 


Admittedly I did jump when I got tapped on the shoulder by 3 Japanese tourists – I don’t know who was more startled, me or them when I jumped and gasped at the same time. They were wanting to know if the bus would take them to Footscray. 

It wasn’t until after midnight that I got home, but I spent the whole ride feeling inspired. It really opened my eyes to something outside the tightly-wound bubble I currently live in and I need more of those moments. 

19 Dec – Reflection of Emotion

Audrey Hepburn said, “If my world were to cave in tomorrow, I would look back on all the pleasures, excitements and worthwhilenesses I have been lucky enough to have had. Not the sadness, not my miscarriages or my father leaving home, but the joy of everything else. It will have been enough.” Do you think you would do the same, or do the sad times stand out in your mind?

It’s hard for me to sit here and reflect on the positive experiences I’ve had in my life, or even the past few years, because it’s always been overshadowed by the negative and sad times – I think because they’re the moments that generate a more significant emotional reaction; they’re the ones that are the hardest to deal with and the ones that take more of an emotional toll on us.

Continue reading

18 Dec – Shaped By Our Thoughts

Buddha said, “We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves.” Do you believe this is true?

I’ve always been surrounded by people who share this concept, and for some people it rings true, however, for others, like myself, I’m not entirely certain…

Continue reading

19 Nov – The Funny One

Are you the funny one in most groups? What kinds of things do you find funniest?

I’m not going to lie, I’m the funny one in most of my circles. I’m not sure why that is, but that’s just how it goes. Depending on the group, I’m generally the funniest because I say what most people are thinking, but are too scared to vocalise it.

Continue reading

24 Sept – Self Healing

Do you think it is possible to heal on our own, or do we always need to reach out for the comfort of other people in order to fully heal?

I can’t really speak for anybody else, but I know for my own peace of mind, I do all my healing predominantly by myself.

Continue reading

Daily Prompt – Curve Balls

When was the last time you were completely stumped by a question, a request, or a situation you found yourself in? How did you handle it?

It’s not very often that I find myself lost for words… oh who am I kidding, I’m surrounded by fuckwits on a daily basis, the only reason I’m lost for words is because I can’t decide which swear words I want to start shouting without it seeming like an epsiode of tourettes.  Continue reading

8 Sept – Time To Heal

Do you give yourself time to heal, or do you keep making yourself move forward?

 
If I were to allow myself to really heal from all the shit that has messed me up so much, I’d need at least 6-12months of not working, a fuck load of therapy and a lot of alternate therapy like yoga and meditation, along with a lot of writing!
Continue reading

Daily Prompt – Locked and Sealed

Can you keep a secret? Have you ever — intentionally or not — spilled the beans (when you should’ve stayed quiet)?

I have a lot of secrets. About a lot of people. And let’s just say they should be mindful of that fact should they choose to talk shit about me behind my back… thinking that I won’t find out. Otherwise it would be a shame if those secrets happen to ‘accidentally’ be revealed to certain individuals… In other words, don’t fuck with me.

Continue reading