Mar 31 – Monthly Lesson

Tell us one thing you learned about yourself this month.

It’s interesting to be writing this post almost two weeks after the date of this prompt, because on this specific day, I found myself away on a work trip down on the coast. It was the first time that we’d been included in a work-trip such as this, so it was somewhat exiting and intriguing.

One of the best parts about this trip was the resort where we stayed. 5-star resort and I was fortunate enough to find myself in one of the most incredible rooms I’ve ever stayed in. It was absolute heaven. The room was also one of the few rooms that actually had a balcony, with a view overlooking the resorts’ golf course, and then looked out to the ocean.

I really did enjoy being in an environment such as this – and it’s a place that I would certainly come back to of my own accord in the future, but in the context of this work trip, it was nice to just be out of an office environment, and actually get to spent time with, and speak to other work colleagues.

The one thing that really hit home for me though, was a realisation of just how much I miss being around water. Given that my star sign is Scorpio, it’s also a water sign, which creates a natural attraction to bodies of water… predominantly, the ocean. I love it. For me, there’s something quite therapeutic and healing about even just being near the water. But to actually be in the ocean, is something really special. Whilst we were there, I actually took an opportunity to go for a swim whilst we were there, and despite the water being incredibly cold, it was quite a liberating moment for me.  I was there by myself, enjoying this moment of peace, serenity and pure happiness. The morning that we left, I got up quite early to go for a swim. I knew that the water was going to be cold, but I really didn’t let that deter me at all. I wanted to make the most of this rare opportunity.

Watching the sun rise over the ocean was an amazing (and freezing) experience, but one I’ll never forget. For a moment, I felt so completely alone. It was a moment of solitude, and a moment I’ve never experienced before. Being neck deep in refreshing icy-cold salt water was incredible in itself, but when you’re all alone with your thoughts and the beauty of nature, it can become quite overwhelming, and a realisation that almost brought me to tears.

As I walked away from the beach, I realised that I need to have more moments like this in my life.

Without a doubt – I need to.

Mar 26: Alone But Not Lonely

Do you enjoy being alone? What do you do when you’re by yourself?

Dear Hulk, If you ever read this, please don’t be offended or take what I’m about to say personally… xx

I love being alone.

Well, in the right context. I have always been quite independent, ever since I was a little kid. From an early age, I learnt that it’s true what they say – the only person you can truly depend on is yourself. As a result, when I got a bit older and began travelling interstate by myself, I realised that I didn’t need to depend on anybody. All I needed was myself, and that was fine. It wasn’t until I moved out of home, moved interstate, and found myself living in a share house that I realised just how much I enjoyed being alone.

I was responsible to nobody else, except me. If I wanted to just come home after work and eat a whole tub of ice-cream… I could. If I wanted to come home after work and just go straight to bed and sleep for 12hrs – I could. If I wanted to take a day off to see a couple of movies, I’d do it on a Tuesday because it was ‘Tight-Arse Tuesday’ and all tickets were $9 – so I’d end up seeing something like 4 movies back-to-back. If I wanted to spend a Sunday doing nothing but sleeping, then I would. If I woke up one morning and wanted to go on an adventure, then I’d just do it. I had nobody to consider; nobody to consult with. I was a free-agent and could do whatever I wanted. It was a good time. But in saying that, I did also get quite lonely. Yes, I had a small close-knit circle of friends to fall back on when I wanted somebody to hang out with… but I had a good balance of company and solitude.

Just recently, I was away on a work trip, and found myself feeling quite lonely at night time because I missed having Hulk around… but at the same time, there were some quiet moments that I truly enjoyed being by myself. Swimming in the ocean at 7am when there isn’t a single person on the beach was truly an exhilarating experience. Granted, the water was incredibly cold (hence why it was completely deserted), but there was just something about that moment that I truly loved. Being able to experience that was something that I would never have done had it not been for the fact that I was away at the coast, and only because a few other colleagues had been discussing it the night prior.

I didn’t care. I just enjoyed being in the ocean. It’s been so long since I had been in the ocean, and it’s an experience that I miss quite a lot, and an experience that I have craved for a considerable amount of time.

Standing in icy water, armpit deep in the water on an empty beach, watching the sun begin to rise is something that I’m actually quite glad that I got to experience by myself. I didn’t have to share it with anybody else. It’s an experience and a memory that was, and forever will be, just mine.

Temporary solitude amongst the icy waters of Torquay Beach

When I got back to the hotel, I had quite a long hot shower (to defrost myself) and sat outside on the balcony in my oversized fluffy robe, watching the sun continue to rise, and listening to the echo of the waves crashing on the shore in the distance… and I realised that I could happily wake up to this every single day. I actually began to think that I would like to come back here at some point, purely just to focus on doing some serious writing… like working on a novel or something equally creative.

…however, to stay at that resort would cost an absolute fortune, and I simply couldn’t justify that sort of luxurious indulgence.