Daily Prompt: Ingredients

What’s the one item in your kitchen you can’t possibly cook without? A spice, your grandma’s measuring cup, instant ramen — what’s your magic ingredient, and why?

No, not Paula Deen. Butter.

Slippery, greasy, golden goodness. As somebody who bakes, everything that I make has butter in it. And it’s usually in every component. The batter, the filling, the frosting. Butter, butter, butter.

And as somebody who should really be paying more attention to their expanding waistline, I don’t really know how to address this problem… I love baking, and I love butter, but I don’t like gaining weight… why can’t I be able to, quite literally, be able to have my cake and eat it too… and not put on weight?

I think this is the exact reason why I prefer to wear trackies (sweat pants) and comfortable clothing (read: fat clothing) instead of showing all my lumpy-bumpy bits. Ugh, it’s hideous. The problem is, that it just makes a dish. Even when cooking dinner, it’s the sort of thing that is a fundamental ingredient of French cuisine. Have you ever had seafood that was just cooked in butter and some herbs. OMFG it’s unbelievable. Sometimes Hulk will create something special and do king prawns and scallops in some kind of butter sauce, and rather than the half-a-dozen pieces of seafood we get each, I really just want to have an entire bowl full of it. Or a lobster tail with a burnt butter sauce… yum-yum-in-my-tum-tum!! Fuck having anything else. Salad? Now you’re just talking crazy talk!

And let it also be known that when it comes to having freshly baked bread / scones / cheesey muffins etc, the only (and I mean ONLY) condiment you need is butter. And lashings of it. Moreso if it’s just come out of the oven and it’s still hot. You don’t need to ruin it by putting margarine or soy-spread on it. Good quality oil… I’ll let that one sneak past, but other than that, it’s butter all the way.

Speaking of butter, do they still make ‘I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter!’? I will admit, I did try that when it was available here in Australia, and from what I can remember, it was actually quite impressive. But now that I think back, I wonder about all the nasties that would have gone into something like that…??

So whilst I sit here and wait for my arteries to slowly harden, I couldn’t help but share something. When I first read the prompt, my instant reaction was butter. And the first thought once I thought of butter was…

Now, for those of you who aren’t on the same page, this is an Oprah reference. One that was brought to my attention by my favourite bitch, Kathy Griffin. In order to give yourself an Oprahcation (Oprah-education), enjoy the YouTube clip below…

….GAAAIIILLLL!!!

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2014/02/09/daily-prompt-ingredients/

Daily Prompt: Style Icon

Describe your personal style, however you’d like to interpret that — your clothing style, your communication style, your hair style, your eating style, anything.

I really don’t know how to answer this, because I’m not really certain of what my style actually is…

Clothing style: Comfort. I like things to be comfortable and relaxed. I’m not a suit & tie person, I never have. I’ve had to for work, but even then, I’ve certainly not enjoyed it. Sometimes I wish I was, but I simply don’t have the wardrobe space for a plethora of suits and shirts ties. Hell, I don’t even own an iron!

It’s also partly because I work in the fitness industry, so majority of my wardrobe is all gym gear.

Communication Style: Sarcasm.

Most of the time, anything that comes out of my mouth is sarcasm. Sarcasm and humour. I have a tendency to shoot my mouth off and then think about what I’ve said and it’s usually with a touch of remorse and guilt, but most of the time I don’t apologise. Now, I have to make sure that I really think about what I’m going to say before I say it, because I usually just say things as throwaway comments without actually meaning anything by it, however, the people that I say these things too take them seriously and literally and are easily offended or upset by it. And that just annoys me. They should know by now that I’m like this, and to basically just take anything I say with a grain of salt.

Hair Style: A hot mess.

Previously, I had what I referred to as my lesbian hair, which was partially shaved with a little mohawk on top…

…but just not that long, and it didn’t trail down the back of the head – it was just on top. But now it’s growing out and going all curly again. I can’t stand my hair. I had a dream last night that I ended up growing my hair right out and had a small curly afro, and I actually liked it. Clearly, it was more of a nightmare, rather than a dream.

Eating Style: Get in mah belleh.

There is nothing attractive at all about watching me eat. If anything, I see food as some kind of competition – how much food can I stuff into my body, in as little time as possible, before I end up feeling like I either want to vomit or die.

Usually when it comes to dinner with Hulk, he always finishes dinner before me. I end up eating really slowly because I’m too focused on whatever show we’re watching and I take my time… but when it comes to desserts, I inhale mine. Especially when it comes to ice-cream. I can be down to the stick of a Magnum before he’s even eaten off all the chocolate of his.

It’s a bit disgusting.

 

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2014/01/08/daily-prompt-style-2/