Daily Prompt: Keeping Up with the Jones’

Tell us about the one luxury item you wish you could afford, in as much detail as you can. Paint a picture for us.

I wonder how many people are writing about the same things in response to this prompt? You know, things like bigger TV’s, flashy cars, the latest iDevice, expensive jewellery / clothing / shoes etc.

Well, I’ve got one thing. An overseas holiday.

I’ve never actually had a holiday. Yes, I have travelled, and I’ve even been overseas to do so (although, that was only New Zealand and it’s only been twice!) but still, it counts (although not according to my passport that still remains stamp-less!). Anywhere I’ve travelled to has been for either two reasons: family and / or work.

But what about me?! What about travelling for me?! I know of far too many people who are always banging on about how they’re off overseas for x-amount of weeks, or they’ve just come back from such-and-such a country, or they’re planning a 2 week trip to Thailand (again) for the third or fourth time this year, or how they’ve just sent their child off overseas for a six-week trip to Europe.

Are you fucking KIDDING ME!?!? How on earth do people afford these things? Seriously, how much money are you making if you can afford so much travel?? Even if you are lucky enough to get cheap flights and possibly, cheap accommodation, yes, that makes it much more affordable, but some people seem to just have money coming out of their ears, and those are the people who love to flaunt it in everybody’s face.

LOOK AT ME!! LOOK, DAMN IT!! LOOK AT WHAT I’M DOING WITH MY DISPOSABLE INCOME THAT YOU CLEARLY DON’T HAVE!! LOOK AT HOW THIS MAKES ME BETTER THAN YOU!!

…fuck off.

I want to travel for me. And Hulk. But mainly for my own self-indulgent pleasure.

I want to find myself on a beach somewhere. Don’t necessarily care right now, those details are secondary. A beach with white sand and crystal clear waters. Massages by (or on) the beach twice a day. Copious amounts of sleeping and lazing around in the sun to work on getting a fabulous tan (instead of this pasty-white skin that I’m rocking at the moment). Fresh produce everyday, fruits and vegetables and seafood. Lordy, so much seafood!

I want to go canoeing, and snorkelling on reefs, and taking underwater photos of beautiful fish and turtles. I want to go swimming with dolphins, and then end up crying uncontrollably from the onslaught of raw pent-up emotion. I want to find myself in paradise; in a place where the rest of the world doesn’t even exist. I want to completely forget about the stresses of work, and working two jobs. Forget about the stresses of being constantly tired, and being time poor, and having late nights and late dinners. I want to be able to eat dinner at a normal time, and eat it at the beach!!

But the worst part of it all, is that some bitch out there is going to turn around and tell me that they’ve just come back from 3 weeks in the Maldives, and tell me about how utterly ahmaaaahhhzing it was, and that I ‘simply must go there sometime’.

Oh should I? Thanks for confirming that one for me.

 

 

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Daily Prompt: Come Fly with Me

Share a story about the furthest you’ve ever traveled from home.

I’m not entirely sure where it began, but ever since I was a kid, I’ve always been quite independent. I recall that during my childhood,  I was always out doing something. Down the park with some of the other kids in the town that I grew up in, or over a friends place. Curfew was sunset. Unless I was staying over for dinner. Back then we lived in this tiny little town with about 100 people in the town. I only had twenty-something kinds in my primary school which was K-6, so when I say I grew up country, I mean I FUCKING GREW UP COUNTRY, like C O U N T R Y ! ! ! ! 

We’re talking, country as in, everybody else lived out on farms. 70%+ of the families that lived in the town were all related.

…I’ll just leave you to think about that last bit for a little bit. 

I don’t want to say that they were the kissing cousins kind of people… but… oh wait, no, that’s EXACTLY what I’m saying.

Maybe I should start this again??

Hi, when I was a kid, we lived in a tiny country town that was full of inbred rednecks. A town where if you were a boy, you played football, and if you were a girl, you played netball. If you played neither, there was something wrong with you.

Wow. Okay, so this could quite EASILY turn into a major therapy series of blog posts… but we’ll save that for later. Maybe next month I’ll start my own daily post challenge – 30 days explaining why my childhood lead to me being so damaged? *lol*

what the fuck am I meant to be writing about again?? Oh yes, travel. Right, where was I going with this…?? That’s right…

My sense of independence… Yes, so, as a kid I was always out and about. Over at a friends place; down at the dam catching yabbies; riding around the dirt hills at the tip on our BMX’s… then that progressed to going on longer rides… I wonder where that dirt road goes?? I remember one ride I went on led me down all these dirt roads and paddock lanes until I arrived at a sealed road, and for a good 5 minutes, didn’t actually know where I was. Also, this was before we had mobile phones, so I couldn’t exactly call somebody and say ‘Oh hi, mum. Um, listen, I’m somewhere where I don’t know where I am. Can you pick me up?’

Nope. Sorry.

Turns out I was three-quarters of the way to the next town. Sigh. I was tired and exhausted, and now, I had to ride home. 

This was gonna take a while.

In high-school I had a couple of moments where I would think, ‘fuck this. I can’t do this right now’ (meaning school… meaning being bullied) So I’d pack a bag, call a relative in Sydney and tell them I’m catching the midnight train, and I’ll be at their place for breakfast. Then I’d spend my time heading off to do dance classes around the place and forget about all the turmoil awaiting me when I return home.

Up until 2012, I’d never left the country. The most distant place I’d travelled to was Brisbane. Then last year Hulk and I went to New Zealand. He’d never travelled overseas either, so it was a first for us. An exciting adventure, which actually turned out to be somewhat of an anti-climax. Although we travelled to NZ, we only stayed in Auckland and didn’t actually travel.

This year we did the exact same thing. Yes, it was another trip to NZ, but no adventure. Unfortunately it was full of drama, and politics, and it actually kind of ruined the fun of going to NZ for me. It’s just a shame that the people who all-but destroyed my spirit over there were all people that I know.

Thanks guys, you pack of shunts.

And guess what, there’s talk of another trip over there in a couple of months, but ideally, we’d like to head over to Fiji, or the Cook Islands or something like that. Somewhere nice and realxing… white sand, crystal clear ocean… paradise… and then on the way home, go via AKL again. Fingers crossed it’s another soul-destroying experience. *lol* Too many selfish, childish frenemies.

 

 

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